Some of the web’s most brilliant dating bloggers share their opinions on the biggest mistake that men make when approaching women.
There is plenty of dating advice on the internet, and some of it really is sensational.
Last week, I asked eight of my favourite dating bloggers: “What is the biggest mistake that men make when hitting on women?”
Some of their responses were surprisingly similar.
Read what they have to say, subscribe to their blogs and stalk them on social media. Doing so may make your life that little bit better.
Caroline Brealey (@MATCHMAKER_MISS)
Caroline was voted Matchmaker Of The Year 2014 at the UK Dating Awards and is head judge at this year’s event. She blogs at carolinebrealey.co.uk.
Caroline says: “Men shouldn’t try and show off. It’s cliche but women prefer a man who is confident in himself rather than a man feels he has to be someone he’s not.”
Johnny Berba (@JOHNNYBERBAGAME)
Johnny Berba is a dating coach who teaches men how to conquer anxiety and attract women naturally. You can learn more about Johnny at johnnyberba.com or read his interview with The London Dater.
Johnny says: “The no.1 mistake guys make when approaching girls is being too outcome dependent and letting insecurity rise up.
“Many feel like they need her phone number to feel better about themselves, rather than concentrating on saying hello, seeing what happens and enjoying the moment.”
Drew Schroeder (@DREWDATING)
Drew Schroeder is a young dating coach based in Las Vegas who regularly blogs about the fundamentals of picking up girls at drewdating.com.
Drew says: “Too often I get guys coming to me, asking how to get girls to like them.
“Most dating coaches (the bad ones anyway) tell the guy to just keep talking and sooner or later they will get better.
“What they really need to do is just get the girls to keep talking and just them.
“Everyone’s favourite subject is themselves so women will be more than happy to have a listener to talk to and just nod their head and agree with them.”
Joshua Pompey (@JOSHUAPOMPEY)
Joshua is an online dating expert who has been helping people find love online for over half a decade. He blogs at jpompey.com.
Joshua says: “The worst thing is trying too hard and using pick-up artist material. Just be natural, be yourself and be interesting. If you don’t appear natural it’s game over.”
Katie Haller (@HALLERATYOU)
Katie is a stand-up comedian who shares strong opinions on the dos and don’ts of dating. She blogs at elitedaily.com/users/khaller.
Katie says: “I don’t like men trying too hard to be ‘smooth’. Find an organic way to be confident even if you don’t feel it.”
Chelsea Hetzel (@INSPIRE_INDULGE)
Chelsea is a lifestyle blogger who regularly writes about self-improvement, dating and relationships at inspiration-indulgence.com.
Chelsea says: “I don’t like men who are too sexual. Girls like a class act. If guys are trying to hit on them, it should be asking them out on a date or starting a conversation about something real, not just calling them ‘hot’ or ‘sexy’ because then it’s clear what he’s looking for.”
Kayla Lords (@KAYLALORDS)
Kayla is an independently published erotic fiction writer who lives and loves the world of BDSM. Her NSFW blog is at kaylalords.com
Kayla says: “The number one mistake is often talking too much. I’m a natural-born listener so I don’t mind when a man talks and I listen, but they also need to show curiosity about me and ask questions to draw me out. Even if I don’t want to share, I like that they ask.”
Claire Isabelle (@WHATIKNOWNOW1)
Claire speaks from the heart about her dating experiences on her intimate blog whatiknownowblog.com
Claire says: “I really hate it when guys are too self-depreciating. It’s a little unattractive and awkward. I think being comfortable with yourself is best.”
The London Dater (@LDNdater) says…
The bloggers responses were essentially several variants of ‘relax’ ‘be yourself.’ and ‘be a good listener’.
It sounds easy, but there’s certainly something special about a man who doesn’t put on a song and dance around stunning women.
Most men feel like they need to be especially entertaining in order to maintain her attention…but our dating experts agree that this isn’t actually all that attractive.
You may have to take the burden of the conversation until she opens up to you, but once she’s comfortable enough, encourage her to share some interesting stuff about herself. Then, test the waters with some flirting here and there. That should be enough to get her on a date or maybe even more.